What’s the limit?

This whole week has been madness. For a moment, I thought I was going to lost it. But I took a breather, calm myself. It felt like all of a sudden, everything seemed to overwhelm me and I was lost in this huge pile of work.

Papers, files, documents, laptop, pens, pencil, highlighter, paperclips, stapler. Everything stationary on this planet you can find, it was on my table. Stacks of documents that I was trying to sort out. Issues not explained by the client. To follow up with them. It was a pain. And all of this, was trying to finish up my work that was brought foward from last week. What made it worse was the fact, my other team was ‘pushing’ me, asking when I am coming back. Seems like I am being stretch now. I mean, it all sounded friendly but after a while, it becomes a little bit annoying. I mean, cut me some slack yah. It’s not I do not want to go back but I have to clear up my work before I can move on. I have enough backlogs to last me a while.

I was exhausted. Been leaving work late the past few days. All because I was rushing to finish 10 friggin piece of documentation work. Luckily, managed to get one of the colleagues to help me. Otherwise, I probably drown by now. It ain’t easy. I felt discouraged and demoralised at times, when I couldn’t figured it out. I wish I could be more efficent but my lack of knowledge and experience was clearly evident in these aspect. Times like this, I wish I took accounting in school.

Well, I managed to clear most of it, except a few minor loose ends to tidy up. I hope I can clear it all by tomorrow so that I can have a piece of mind over the weekend.

missy j has been feeling down the whole day and I felt bad that I am not there for her. Sigh, I wish I could do something about it and make her feel better.

I need time off from work man and I seriously anticipating the day I leave the country for Koh Samui. Can’t wait…Everything’s all planned out and all we need is to get our ass to the airport and leave everything behind for a while.

3:41

I am still in the office at this time of the hour. Talk about hard earned money.

Motivation

“Life is ten percent what happens to you and ninety percent how you respond to it.”

- Lou Holtz

How much is enough?

Why do we have to go to such extent of details? Sigh. The more I do, the more frustrating it becomes. It’s good to know and learn but given such a tight timeline. Is it feasible?

I wake up everyday… and all thoughts about work start to flood into my head. This is frigging ridiculous. For the amount of we are paid.. I simply don’t understand why people say audit is ‘good’ money.

Mo Money

On a ‘happier’ note, we are expecting our bonus payout in a couple of the days time. Quietly anticipating the ‘time’ of the year where we are so-called rewarded for all the work we done. Not sure what to expect but I am hoping that it is reasonable. I am trying hard to keep an open mind and not put a number to it. Otherwise, I’ll end up disappointing myself. Heard rumours flying around but took it with a pinch of salt because no one knows exactly how much the firm made. I think it has to be the most guarded secret for now. Other firms already received their payout. Only us… which is taking like forever to do the closing and computation. Bah.

*rubbing hands* think Wheel of fortune… “BiG MonEY! BiG MONEY!!!“

I still can’t find my friggin pass.

I found my pass and keys!!! Apparently I left it in my colleague’s bag! Doh. She only found it this morning when looking for stuff in her bag. This is what happens when most of us are using the same colour and type of bag.

ARGH!!!

First it was my keys. Now I have lost my employee pass too!! WTF! What is wrong with me?!?!

Tip of the day

Lesson One. Never ever leave the spare key the same drawer which you are locking up. Because you just never know when you will need it.

It happened to me. I lost my bunch of keys over the weekend so that means, I had to replicate most of the keys except my personal drawer which I had no idea where it was but vaguely remembered that it was somewhere around. So I had to use primitive methods of trying to open my drawer. Tried picking the lock with missy j. Tried dismantling it and my dad with the use of some brute force, destroyed the lock. Doh. In the end, with the use of a screw driver, we managed to open up drawer. Thank god! and I saw the friggin key inside!! Felt like kicking myself in the ass. Told myself that in future, I have to keep the key somewhere safe. Anywhere but the same drawer which I lock.

Looking at my keys now… it looks plain and pathetic. Sigh. I missed my keychain. It had quite a sentimental value. I got it during Airforce days and it reminds me of what I always want to achieve yet not possible… It seems like this time round, it is for sure that somethings are just not meant to be… Time to move on buddy…

Health living is the way of life

I realised that now that time is flashing by before I say “Ah”, I think sometimes, it’s good to stop and think about our current state of health. I have been working and rushing around a very hectic engagement and almost unrealistic timelines. Facing tremendous amount of pressures and stress but I learnt to cope. Yet somehow in the process, it wears me down. I felt the fatigue from the late nights and next week, it’ll be part two. This time, more scope of work and yet another unrealistic deadline. Backlogs are starting to creep up and that frustrates me. Both mentally and physically. I wonder why am I pushing myself so hard. For what reasons and purpose…. but that is another issue on its own.

Back to health. Most of us tend to take our body for granted and as long as there are no symptoms, we are ‘fine’ and young and ’strong’. However, that is not true. These things will gradually ‘come back’ to us in later years. My mom always remind to take care of ourselves now and if we don’t, we will suffer in our later years. I know, usually, i’ll just brushed it off. But having went through a medical screening earlier this year made me realised that I am just as vulnerable as anybody else. That puts me into a conscience habit in the things I eat/drink nowadays. My colleague was asking why am I so concerned about my health? He felt that I was slightly over reacting but I told him that there is no wrong to be cautious about the food I eat. He went on to say that as long as you exercise that’s good enough. But I disagreed, saying that exercise can reduce the risk of falling sick and maintaining health balance but if you finish a large pizza with loads of cheese and meat, do you think by exercising alone, will help? I doubt so.

Whatever it is. I think a balance has to be achieve… not just by simplying focusing on one and neglecting the other. But I guess everyone has different perception of keeping healthy and it is not in my position to comment to who is right and what is wrong. As long as everyone is happy and living the life they deem fit. that’s all it matters.

Deadlines. So fucking dead.

It’s been a long while since i’m stuck in the office at this time. To be honest, I can feel the fatigue settling in as I’m typing this. So much work at hand… and so little time. Talk about racing aginst time. Fuck man. This is one race I am not doing too well at the moment. Need to buck up and re-org. I mean, this is certainly a challenge to perform. To see how well I managed my work in such compressed time.

At the same time, working on this job restricts the amount of time i get to see missy j. and that sucks, coz she’s going through a rough patch right now and i wish i could do something about it and comfort her. With me, now being away from her… even my working location is out of the way, makes it difficult for me to see her. sigh.

I’m worried about her. I want to see her and give a hug and let her know that everything will be alright. It pains me that i couldn’t do anything right now… coz we are physically apart… and with so many deadlines nearing, I have to spend so much more time clocking OT hours.

It doesn’t help that I’m missing her so much more as time passes….

I’m tired. my eyes are struggling to stay open.

Unforgettable

Saturday was amazing. Had a lovely time with missy j where we explored a coupled of places in Holland V. You’ll be surprised what you can do in a small ‘village’ like that!

We went to this place called 211 rooftop cafe which was pleasant and cosy on its own. Even though it was day when we were there, we could imagine what it would be like during the night… having a meal with a glass of wine and gazing into the moonlit night. Best of all, there is no corkage charge on Tues coz it’s B.Y.O night! Now that certainly is a good deal as I have yet heard of many places offering that sort of service. Definately will be back there on a Tuesday.

We went round the place, doing some window shopping and missy j got herself a lovely white dress. I like the intricate designs that came along with it. Makes it look really unique.

Other than that, it felt like we were in our own world. Everything felt so right and I wish time will never past. The whole day was spent together, travelling to places, to town for dinner @ Manhanttan Fish Market and experienced the chaos of crowded traffic and jams.

I guess the highlight of the day has to be missy j thinking that the car was rolling backwards and she went like “Woh wooh woooh…” and attempting to pull up the handbrake. In reality, what happened was the other car moved off and it was an ‘illusion’ that gave her the impression it was our car that was rolling back. Haha. It was really hilarious and it tickled me sooo much. We both had a good time laughing about it.

Bought 4D for my mom and found out that she won a starter prize. Not bad. Happy for her.

Gonna get dinner treat from her later.

Nothing much for a lazy sunday. I feel fat and I dyed my hair smoky brown. I wish it would be more ’smoky’ hahahaha… oh well.

Charity Shield is on tonight. Liverpool vs Chelsea. English Premier League is starting once more!